


i’ll get back to you (someday)

by poise



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Insecurities, M/M, Morning Kisses, Neck Kissing, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Plants, Slight references to PTSD, cottage, inner turmoil
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-16
Updated: 2020-12-16
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:47:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28113360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poise/pseuds/poise
Summary: Life goes on, but things appear to be at a standstill for Renjun.sequel to the getaway au on twitter.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Na Jaemin
Comments: 8
Kudos: 84





	i’ll get back to you (someday)

**Author's Note:**

> hi woah i cant tell if i like this or not honestly. but it’s a sequel to my renmin au on twitter, which u can read [here](https://twitter.com/rensfilms/status/1233744762793906178?s=21)
> 
> don’t read this if you don’t want to be spoiled 😭

Renjun wakes up to the sun's dazzling rays shining on his face, warming the side of his cheek through the blinds. He blinks away the blurriness to his vision and blocks out the light with his hand. Soft sheets under him, limbs that tangle with his and the very familiar scent of musk that permeates the room. These are things Renjun recognizes to keep him grounded in the morning.

There's a soft thumping in his right ear as well and he easily distinguishes the rhythm it beats to, the only one he knows by heart. It's Jaemin's chest that rises and falls under his cheek, lungs breathing in sync with his own. He lets his hand that blocks the light to fall limply at his side in favour of feeling the way Jaemin's heart pulse with his. It's a funny rhythm he thinks, but it's theirs and theirs only.

The sun doesn't seem to have the same amount of appreciation for Jaemin's placid features as it shines directly into his eyes, rudely stirring him awake. He groans for a few minutes and attempts rolling over to avoid it while Renjun can only laugh silently at this, his own voice ringing at the back of his head. ( _'We need new curtains, Jaemin.' 'No, we don't! I like the sun shining in.'_ )

Jaemin is nothing if not stubborn.

He stops rustling after a while and finally pries one eye open experimentally, taking in the light before his eye lands on Renjun, turning soft. Playfully, he nudges his chin against Renjun's forehead, watching him pull back so he can nuzzle his nose into the area where his neck and shoulder meets.

Renjun smells just like him in the morning and there is nothing Jaemin loves more than breathing him in and letting him consume his senses completely. He's convinced there are ways to get drunk on him.

"Good morning," Renjun whispers against his hair.

"Good morning, genius."

Jaemin answers back, raspier and just the way he knows Renjun likes it. He leaves a kiss under his ear and shifts his arm to wrap around his chest, careful not to jostle the recovering wound near his stomach.

It's been a little over 3 months since Renjun's fake funeral and about a month since they've managed to find this little cottage in the outskirts of Sage. It was cheap and no one asked questions when they rented the place under different names, so it really was a haven for them after bouncing from city to city for 2 months.

They stay like that for a little while, basking in the morning sunshine before Jaemin starts kissing down Renjun's neck, licking a spot and scraping his teeth on it raw until he sees the bruise blooming under his lips. He only stops when Renjun lets out a shuddering whimper, nudging his head with his chin.

He lifts his head to give him a cheeky smile, planting one last kiss on his cheek. "Tea?"

Renjun shakes his head. "Coffee."

"Since when do you drink coffee?"

What Jaemin gets is another pinch to his hip. "Since you keep forgetting to buy teabags."

The laugh that escapes past his lips is loud and deep, rumbling from the core of his chest. The way Renjun's hand goes to lie flat against it to feel the way it trembles doesn't go unnoticed.

"I'll go boil the kettle in a bit. Just let me stay like this for a little while." He nuzzles his head back into the crevice of Renjun's neck. He knows Renjun wouldn't turn down the offer for a good cuddle in the morning.

"I can do it if you're tired." He says after a few minutes.

Jaemin brushes his lips around the sensitive part of his neck and revels in the way Renjun shivers under him. "No, I'll do it. You just stay in bed."

Hesitantly, he pulls back with a groan threatening on the edge of his lips at the loss of body heat. The air in the room was cold and Renjun was warm.

He gives him one last look, smiling at the way he looks bunched up in the sheets, blanket thrown over his head with his hair splayed out on the pillow. Jaemin wouldn't say it out loud, but he thinks Renjun always looks the cutest in the morning.

  
  
  


Renjun ends up falling asleep for another 5 minutes before he's stirred awake by the sound of coffee beans being grounded in the kitchen. His hand instinctively reaches out for his phone on the bedside table, checking the time and groaning when he realizes it's finally time to leave the bed. His calloused feet touch the wooden floor and trembles as it bites his skin with the cold. He leaves the bed to be made for later and waddles into their shared bathroom, aching for his warm house slippers.

On the way there, he catches a glimpse of their packed suitcases from the closet door left ajar, reminding him that they never really stay anywhere for long, bags packed and ready to leave whenever things get too dangerous again. But he learns to enjoy himself while he's here.

Both he and Jaemin have become quite the homebody these past few months, now that they're staying under the radar. It was inherently hard at first when they're both so used to the fast life. Especially for Jaemin. Renjun would catch him staring longingly at the city's outline in the distance, feeling the same urge to pack up and enjoy the rest of their youth as they should. But his fear for their safety, especially Renjun's, keeps him grounded. He starts picking up little hobbies instead; planting strawberries in their small patch of land in the backyard, plaiting straw hats in the kitchen and nursing house plants back to life. He even kept his classic blue car in the garage and traded it for a more rustic pick-up truck, perfect for blending in with the locals in Sage.

Renjun finds it endearing, to say the least. Sometimes though, he can’t help but think about how he feels like he's holding him back from all the things he could be doing. Jaemin is young, inherently good-looking and dashingly charming for his age. He can have anyone he could ever want. Renjun thinks he shouldn't need to settle for damaged goods like himself.

He splashes the cold tap water over his face, hoping to wash away the thoughts plaguing his mind this early in the morning. He loves Jaemin and Jaemin loves him. For now, he tells himself that it's enough to get him through the day. Renjun glances at his appearance in the mirror for the first time today, chuckling at the lines that decorate his cheeks from being pressed onto crumpled sheets all night.

What he didn't pick up all those months ago when they were on the run was the fact that Jaemin moves in his sleep, like a lot. Often, Renjun would wake up at random times of the night with Jaemin's head halfway down the bed and his limbs sprawled out like a starfish across the sheets. He makes it a habit now to put pillows over the edge to stop him from knocking his head on their bedside table.

His eyes travel lower down to his neck and feel the heat flare up in his cheeks when he catches the sight of the bruise blooming just under his t-shirt. It’s small but pretty, just enough colour on his sun-kissed skin. 

Almost instinctively, his hand moves closer to his gut, feeling the hard patch of bandage securing his old bullet wound. It’s healed now, but any sudden movements and hard labour could tear it right back open. Jaemin insists they keep the bandage on from time to time. 

He knows he’s not supposed to, but Renjun gets curious now and then. He pulls back the plaster and turns his stomach to the mirror, gazing intently at the ugly wound that stares back at him—scarred and dry. Damaged goods. 

He gets so lost in his thoughts that he almost doesn’t hear the knock from their front door. 

Something instantly tugs in his chest, alarm bells that ring in his ear by reflex. Even though their cottage wasn’t that far out of town, there still weren’t enough neighbours around to greet them casually. Jaemin only talks to the old ladies at the market and no else. Even they don’t know where he lives. 

Renjun finds his feet walking to the door, passing by the kitchen with nimble steps before Jaemin manages to catch his wrist, putting a finger over his lips for him to stay. A crease had started to form on this forehead, digging into the soft skin near his eyebrows. Jaemin had been just as wary as he was.

“Let me open the door.” He whispers. 

Renjun wants to detest, but it probably is the best plan. He has been legally pronounced dead after all. 

He lets Jaemin take the lead, tailing close behind him with his hand in his. 

There’s another series of knocks on the door before he actually unlocks it, swinging it open by a sliver. 

“Hey, I’m sorry to pop in all of a sudden, but I was in town and wanted to remind you that rent is due next week.” Their landlord’s face greets him with a smile. Renjun lets out a breath he doesn’t realize he was holding from behind the door. 

Jaemin seems to do the same, only he tries to hide it, giving a blinding smile in return. “Yeah, don’t worry. We’ll get it to you by next week.”

They mutter a few more greetings before Jaemin finally shuts the door back, locking it securely in place. Neither of them noticed how hard they were squeezing each other’s hands until their eyes met. 

They share a mutual look, one of filled with relief and sharp around the edges knowing the things in the past will always haunt them and fill their chests with doubt. That neither of them can go on living without constantly looking over their shoulder.

But Jaemin squeezes his hand one more time, so tightly and reassuring that Renjun locks these thoughts in the back of his mind and throws the key in a bottomless abyss.

_We are okay._

  
  
  


Their day is well spent lazing around and ends with Renjun sitting by the steps in their backyard, warding off the mosquitos as he watches Jaemin tend to his strawberry patch in his worn-out dungarees. Today's events are still fresh in his mind, playing like a broken record and although they don't speak about it, he knows Jaemin can't stop thinking about it either.

Renjun sees him give him a quick look while he's halfway through watering the leaves, dirt smeared across his right cheek and the sun shining in his eyes despite his straw hat. Jaemin is so incredibly beautiful, he thinks. Even with his sharp features and piercing gaze, he could blend in almost anywhere he wants. Jaemin could be a dashing stranger from the city or the guy-next-door with kind eyes and no one would be able to tell the difference. No one except Renjun. When everyone sees fragments of Jaemin, Renjun sees him as a whole. As who he really is.

He wonders if that’s what Jaemin needs. Another set of emotional baggage to remind him of his past.

A soft tap on his cheek brings his attention back to other, smiling blindly at him. He takes a seat beside Renjun, not caring if there's dirt on his pants.

"What are you thinking about?"

He answers him earnestly, "You."

"Oh, yeah?" Jaemin wiggles his eyebrows.

Renjun laughs, mind wandering off his troubling thoughts as he nudges the other by the arm and scrunches his face. "You reek of sweat and dirt. Go take a shower."

This only prompts Jaemin to inch closer, leaving no space between them. He arches his eyebrows even more. "What? You don't find this sexy?" He pushes his muddy dungarees onto Renjun's shirt and watches satisfyingly as he playfully attempts to throw Jaemin off him, getting even dirtier with every struggle.

"Jaemin, stop." He says between breaths, laugh barely contained in his chest as Jaemin continues, wrapping his hand around Renjun's torso and tickling him to no end.

He stops immediately when he hears Renjun hiss. Panic rises in his chest, completely detaching himself to look at him in the eye and then back at his stomach.

"I'm sorry, does it hurt?"

It only pinches a little, but it doesn't hurt. Muscle spasms, Renjun gets those a lot around the wound. He tells Jaemin exactly that but it still doesn't manage to convince him.

"Do you want me to open up and check?"

"No, it's fine. Really." He chuckles. "Go take a shower. You're a mess."

"So are you."

"And whose fault is that?"

Jaemin feigns innocence. "Take a shower with me then."

Renjun takes a little bit more convincing until he finally gives in, hauled by his wrist into the house as the sun sets and a smile etched onto his lips.

  
  
  


He's glad he took Jaemin up on his offer because the next 20 minutes in the shower was pure bliss to him. Jaemin's fingernails mindlessly scraping against his scalp, his warm wandering hands carefully covering every inch of his skin. Renjun shudders when Jaemin's hand brushes against his scar. He makes sure to return the favour by scrubbing the dirt off his face and arms.

Their shower isn't all that big, there's barely enough space to fit both of them, and yet Jaemin insists each time that they shower together. Renjun seems to be the only one that minds being the cold one when the water doesn't reach his skin. Jaemin, not so much. It doesn't help that the heater only works at certain times of the day though. It's not perfect, but it's theirs.

They get out of the shower dripping and warm with their clothes stuck to their drying figures. Renjun goes straight for the bed, not minding his wet hair while Jaemin goes for the hairdryer, already plugging it in and combing through his hair.

"You'll get sick that way, you know." He chastises.

"Stop nagging. I'll dry it when you're done."

"Let me do it, come here." Jaemin pats the edge of the bed.

He's been especially clingy today, not that Renjun dislikes it. But ever since the accident at the barn, he can't help but notice how delicately Jaemin treats him, like he's made of glass. He hates it sometimes.

But that warm shower has him sleepy and tired, so he gives in anyway.

Jaemin brushes his hand through his locks, letting the damp hair fall between his fingers. The heat blowing into Renjun's scalp is almost calming enough for him to fall asleep then and there. Almost. Jaemin's nimble fingers tugging at his roots stirs him awake every few minutes.

When he's done, he rolls onto his back and gives Jaemin space to finish off drying his own hair.

He doesn't register that he's dozed off a little until there's a dip to his left, causing him to pry his eyes open. Jaemin is lying beside him in his loose t-shirt, his freshly dried hair sticking up in every direction. If Renjun didn't feel so tired, he'd reach a hand out to smoothen it down. He closes his eyes and enjoys the peace for now.

It's short-lived as he feels the sheets under him shift again and when he opens his eyes, Jaemin is looking down on him, all fire hidden behind the gentleness in his eyes. Even though he tries not to let it show, Renjun can see the eagerness in him. His itch to touch, to feel.

Renjun experiments by darting his tongue out to wet at his lips, watching satisfyingly as Jaemin's eyes follow his every move with hooded lids.

He doesn't move away when Jaemin inches closer, hand lifting to cup his cheek as he leans in. He starts with a brief peck on the lips before moving to the edge of his jaw, slowly trailing down and adding a quick kiss on his cheek. Jaemin continues painfully slow down his neck, nipping at his skin and breathing in their body wash from earlier. He moves the loose shirt around Renjun's neck to fall just a little over his shoulder and kisses him there, wet and warm until it makes him tremble when the spot hits the cold air.

Jaemin pulls back to admire his work, Renjun flushed out on the sheets and a thin smile on his pretty lips, just how he likes it.

Just as he's about to pull away, a hand wraps itself on his cold neck, pulling them closer together and letting their lips meet in a proper kiss. Jaemin sighs into his mouth even though he's caught off-guard, quickly letting his hand fall at Renjun's waist to steady him.

They go back and forth, slow but fiery as Renjun takes the lead, biting down on Jaemin's lip to kiss him deeper. Jaemin doesn't seem to mind getting pushed by the shoulder, hand still strong on his waist as Renjun straddles him, still careful not to knock into the bullet wound.

Jaemin's hand on his hip, Jaemin's mouth on his and Jaemin's knee pressing between his thigh. Renjun is so consumed by the very thought of him.

An airy sigh gets caught in the air as they part for a bit but just far enough that they're still panting against each other's lips. That is until Renjun pulls him back in and kisses just as desperately as before—like he's running out of air.

He knows he's been having a hard time with his words lately, so he pours his soul into the kiss and leaves it to do the talking. All his doubts and love. He kisses Jaemin with so much fervour to get the message across for him to pull back completely, the hand on his hip grounding him.

"What's wrong?" He asks.

"It's nothing." Renjun's mouth betrays him.

This time, Jaemin doesn't let him go so easily. He takes Renjun's chin between two fingers and carefully pulls his gaze to him. "Hey, no secrets. Remember?"

He's got him there.

Renjun sighs and pushes himself off Jaemin to lie beside him, suddenly all too aware of the attention he's getting. But he doesn't rush himself and Jaemin doesn't push him for answers, only waits patiently with gentle eyes, albeit a little hazy.

Renjun stares at the ceiling, trying his best to piece together his words. It takes a long stretch of time before he can answer him with a question of his own.

"Do you ever regret it? Coming here?"

Jaemin looks at him earnestly, clearly confused, "What... do you mean?"

He gathers enough courage to look at him in his eye.

"Do you ever regret being with me?" He doesn't give Jaemin the chance to answer just yet. "You could be doing anything right now in the cities, living your best life the way you used to. You could be anyone you want. But you're here, with me. Do you ever regret choosing me...?"

A shaky breath moves past his lips, "I'm like... damaged goods."

Jaemin takes it all in and doesn't interrupt until he's certain Renjun is finished. He takes his time to think out an answer and settles with a clear and simple, "No."

"No, I've never regretted it. Not even for a second. I am living my best life, Renjun. With you." Jaemin takes his face in his hands.

"I know it's scary, and this is new. I get scared sometimes too. But this is what I want because you're here, and you're the best adventure I've ever had. No bright lights and fast cars will ever get me as excited as you do. You're my movie kind of love." He bumps his nose with Renjun.

When he calms down a little, he slips his hand under his shirt and traces the raw scar on his stomach. "This," Jaemin whispers. "This does not make you damaged goods."

Renjun nods and shuts his eyes, replays those words in the back of his mind like a broken record. Scars are a funny thing, he thinks. They’re a reminder that who you were before is not the person you are right now. That something had permanently broken inside you and re-molded itself. It’ll get some used to living with that fact.

He feels Jaemin's warm fingers stay tracing the scar, rubbing circles around it. He doesn't notice how close their faces are until he pulls back just a little, watching Jaemin with his eyes closed, leaning his forehead against his. Renjun can see the way his eyelashes fan against his cheek, delicately like feathers.

He lets the moment carry him as he slowly starts to lean in, trying with a peck on his lips as a warning. Jaemin pries his eyes open and quickly gets the message, leaning forward to meet him half-way but not before silently asking permission—if this is what he really wanted. The look Renjun gives him says he trusts him.

They slowly find a rhythm again, tongues teasingly meet before pulling back and letting wandering hands softly grab at any patch of skin it could find. Renjun pours all his gratitude and love into the kiss. He makes sure Jaemin is feeling loved just as much as he does.

It's Jaemin that straddles him this time, still rubbing warm circles around his scar before he tugs at Renjun's shirt and pulling it right off him.

He hisses as the cold air hits his skin and suddenly feels vulnerable and entirely bare under Jaemin's stare after their intimate conversation. He attempts to put a hand over his scar, covering up the marred skin until the other catches his wrist and lightly pushes it away. He leans back in and leaves a ghost of a kiss around the shell of Renjun's ear.

"You're so pretty." He trails short kisses down his jaw and his neck, stopping now and then to leave a quick bite on the freshly sun-kissed skin.

He stops at Renjun's scar, tracing the tissue then presses his lips against it. Renjun tries not to make the sigh escaping his lips too obvious. Instead, he lifts Jaemin's shirt over his head and discards it somewhere over the floor.

He takes his time admiring the toned chest and lean muscles in front of him as Jaemin works his way painfully slow down his stomach. He looks like something straight out a painting with his newly dyed, jet black hair falling over his eyes.

Jaemin is treating him so delicately again, and though Renjun loves him for loving him so tenderly, he is not made out of glass. Renjun is a lot stronger than he looks. He tells him exactly this as he buries his hand in his hair.

"I'm not going to break, Jaemin."

He receives a breathy laugh against his skin.

"Oh, I know."

Kisses are trailed back up his arm, sending tremors down his spine as Jaemin stops right above him. Eyes looking into his with so much tenderness and fire.

  
  
  


Renjun wakes up the next morning the same way he did yesterday, with the sun shining its light into his eyes. He's too tired to lift a hand to block it out, so he just rolls to the side and buries his head deeper into the blanket. The bareness between his thighs lets the cold creep in but the tangle of limbs beside him keeps him warm.

Yesterday's events threaten to play in his mind but he doesn't push them away. Instead, Renjun allows them to roam his thoughts freely—welcoming them with open arms. It was hard for him to voice out the problems plaguing his mind these past few months, but Jaemin was beside him through all his doubts.

Yesterday reminds him of love more than anything.

Jaemin makes him feel like love, more than anything.

As if right on cue, he stirs awake beside him, using his body as a shield from the sun's blinding rays. He gives Renjun a tiny smile when he realizes he's awake.

"Have you been up long?"

Renjun shakes his head, appreciating the way Jaemin's gaze follows the hair that falls over his eyes. "Just woke up."

Jaemin hums and nuzzles his way into his neck like clockwork, breathes in the scent of musk off his skin. These little routines are things Renjun wouldn't trade for the world.

It feels like an eternity before either of them speaks up again, too busy basking in each other's heat.

"Hey, I've been thinking..." Jaemin starts.

"Uh oh." Renjun teases him playfully, earning himself a poke in the rib.

He knows it's serious when Jaemin pulls back to meet his eyes.

"What if we stayed here? Like, actually settle in. Permanently."

He continues when Renjun doesn't show any signs of disapproval. "I know we said we shouldn't settle anywhere for now. But I really think this place could be good for us. No one knows us. I've been on the road for a long time, I've had so many homes. But none of them has felt this right before."

Renjun smoothens the stray hairs on Jaemin's head and it's his turn to speak softly now. "Is it really what you want? To settle down."

He smiles, "It is if it's with you. I want this. I have been for a long time. Is this what you want?"

If Renjun pulls back far enough, he'll see the way stardust coats his eyes and leaves a hopeful gleam to them. Jaemin's eyes are enchanting but he doesn't need to look into them to know they're magical.

All they have now is right in this bed; tenderness, love and hope. And it is enough.

"I do," Renjun answers him, and he doubts that'll be the last time he'll ever say that to him.

"I want this with you."

**Author's Note:**

> [cc](https://curiouscat.me/813na)   
>  [twt](https://mobile.twitter.com/rensfilms)


End file.
